


Was Mad

by AuroraRoseane



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Maggie Returns, Post 10x17, and she's angry AF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:22:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29706084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AuroraRoseane/pseuds/AuroraRoseane
Summary: One-Shot: Maggie and Daryl (mostly Daryl) have a talk regarding Negan (and a lot of other things).
Relationships: Daryl Dixon & Maggie Greene, Daryl Dixon/Beth Greene (Implied)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 28





	Was Mad

**Author's Note:**

> So it's been literal years and I'm rusty AF, but here's another one of my "Thought of this in the shower and it made me cry" ramblings. Enjoy.

“I just don’t understand how you could’ve forgiven him so easily!”

Her green eyes are wide and frantic, searching for answers she’s not even sure she wants.

They’re standing in the middle of the woods, halted in the process of checking all the traps. When he said he was heading out, she jumped at the chance to go along. She’s been feeling just as caged-in and restless ever since—well ever since _him_.

Her gaze flits across his form as he slowly straightens from being crouched down, resetting a trap. When Daryl’s eyes meet hers they’re searching, wondering if now’s really the best time to tell her what she don’t want to hear. But he can see it, see is she needs it if she’s going to get through the day. Can see she can’t hold on much longer.

She watches as his eyes go from a hunter’s glare to fully resigned, but Maggie forces herself to keep her eyes on his, even though she wants to look away. He’s been better at this lately, much more so over the years. Eons away from the person she’d first met on the farm all those years ago. Knows he’s been trying hard to be the person he wants to be rather than the one the world made him to be, but still knowing it’s not always easy for him. He looks down at the ground quickly, and then back up at her with a softened gaze. She suddenly hates herself for making him say what he’s about to.

“Ain’t forgiven. Prolly won’t ever be. But I can’t—“ his voice is soft and gravelly, as is always is, but his tone is sure even if his words aren’t. “I’ve been mad all my life, Maggie. Mad at my old man for bein’ a piece of shit, mad at my mom for dyin’ and leavin’ me with ‘im. Mad at Merle for doin’ the same, first chance he got. Was mad when the world ended, when--Dale. That I had to be the one to do it because Rick couldn’t.”

He’s starting to get a louder as he goes on, but it’s like, once she gave him permission to open this particular floodgate, Daryl isn’t going to stop. She tears her eyes away from him to do a quick scan of the forest, making sure that he’s not attracting any walkers. He doesn’t notice though, and she knows he’s probably keeping an ear out. He’s always been good about that.

“When the farm fell, and the prison. The governor, and your dad, and--” another heavy inhale and she knows. She knows. “When--when they took her from me, _twice_. I fuckin--” She hears his voice truly break then and he lifts his head to focus on her again. “I wanted to burn that place to the ground. Wanted to strangle her for--” She watches his eyes fill to the brim. “Girl pissed me off more than anyone I’d ever met.” He turns his head away to stare off at nothing, seeing something she couldn’t.

He pauses and she thinks the memories have caught up with him as he lowers his head and shakes it. She thinks he might stop here, might feel like it’s too much, but Daryl Dixon isn’t big on closing the floodgates even if you’re already drowning. He takes a stuttering breath and continues, eyes still on the ground. But Maggie can’t pull hers away from him.

“Woulda helped her with--whatever. Whatever the plan was, if she asked. Instead of--” he sighs. “Woulda done it.”

“I know.”

She says it before she realizes the words were even there, but she’s not lying and he knows that.

They just stare at each other for a minute, and she thinks that maybe, maybe he’s done. That he’s made whatever point he wanted to make and is waiting for her to react.

Daryl rips his gaze from hers to scan the trees and clears his throat before speaking low. “Was dead for a while after that.” She’s surprised and her eyes widen at him once more, remembering a declaration in a barn eons ago. He’s still not looking at her when he starts again. “Told Rick he was wrong ‘bout us being the walking dead. Didn’ believe it though.” He shook his head, and she sees him flex his hand. “Not then.” He sniffs. “But somebody needed to. Even if I couldn’t.”

She feels wetness on her face and she realizes that she’d begun crying. She remembers what it was like back then. How it felt. “Then Ty and Noah. Glenn, Denise, Negan, Carl, Rick. And then you--” He exhales again, loudly, and starts to encroach on her space, getting within a foot of her. He finally looks her in the eye again and she sees that they’re still glossy.

“Was mad when you—“ he chokes up again, tears freely falling down his face openly now and she just knows what he’s about to say so she feels her tears run across her cheeks. “When you left and took Herchel—you left and you—“ he’s gasping for air now, now even trying to pretend that he’s not crying. “You were the last thing I had left, of all of them, and you fucking left without saying anything to anyone!” He’s yelling at this point and for a second she sees a glimpse of the old Daryl. The Daryl she met at the farm all those years ago, instead of the man she’s seen him become. But she sees that ghost flicker out lightyears faster than it took in real life. He speaks normally again, resigned that she’ll either get it now or she never will.

“The Whisperers came and--Negan being out--it ain’t about forgiveness. Ain’t about redemption. Cause he ain’t ever going to get it.” He sighs and looks her dead in the face, but with more emotion behind her eyes than she thinks she’s ever seen. “Spent years being so angry I could kill someone, or feeling dead inside. Ain’t no way to live.” He exhaled. “Ya gotta let it go. Else it kills you.”

His chest is near heaving as if he’d just been running across a field, and both their faces are glistening with tears. Maggie bites her lip and nods at him as more tears leak out of the corners of her eyes, and she looks down at her feet. He’s right, and she knows it. Still isn't easy, but she knows he knows that too.

He gives her a minute and then moves, dropping his hand on her shoulder as he walks past her, back in the direction of the traps still left to check. When he lets go to keep moving she just barely hears him whisper “She taught me that.”


End file.
